I went to my doctor today for my annual check up. I honestly was dreading it as I was fearful what my bloodwork and other tests would show. I am overweight and have never fit into the BMI scale. For my height it says ideally I should weigh 135. I haven’t weighed 135 since I was 17. I have experienced fat shaming at work, with acquaintances and those closer to me and from complete strangers. For years I would not take a selfie or let people post photos of me. I am astonished when people feel the need to comment on my looks and weight. I have been gifted clothing to reduce my size. I listened to my coworker’s tell a fellow coworker how wonderful they looked after having stomach reduction surgery. They lost almost 85 pounds as a result. Skinny gets attention, love and it’s what sells magazines, movies and other things. I was handed diet food at work one night saying I may need it. I asked the employee why and they almost choked trying to give me a politically correct answer. I am not ashamed of my body, my body type or the fact that I have to shop for clothes in large and extra large size.
The doctor ran an ekg on me, then came in asking many, many questions covering my lifestyle, exercise, diet, family history and then asked questions on every part of my body. It was very comprehensive and I asked questions too. I was shocked when the doctor said my bloodwork was normal as were other tests, my blood pressure and pulse was normal, my lungs were surprisingly clear given my asthma. The doctor said I am amazingly healthy in spite of being on the obese side of the BMI scale. I want to tell people who automatically assume that fat people are not healthy to shove it. I know I carry extra weight I don’t need to be told that. My doctor knows I carry extra weight but we are working on healthy ways to reduce my weight. I am proud of my look and my health. I may not be the size 8 or 10 that you see in movies, magazines or elsewhere but I love my body. I will not fear next years annual exam and I will for new ways to deal with those who feel compelled to comment on my weight.
I will continue to write about it as needed and take more photos of myself as I start the journey to lose weight. I am starting horseback riding again next week after not riding for sixteen years. I asked Mike for a bike for my birthday and I got one😃. I am looking forward to taking more photos with a new to me camera. I have been making more time for myself and Mike and I have been embracing a new round of self care. I have been caring for others a lot the past four months as well as all the pets and sometimes forget to care for me.
I chose this photo of me as I love it and think I look great!