I feel as though the bees in my present photos reflect a lot about my life and perhaps my friends lives. I at times feel as though work takes up so much of my time that my friends fall to the wayside. And I think it is similar with my friends. I really get irritated when people say if it is important to you then you would make time. That is easy to say and something else to actually achieve. I used to live twenty minutes from most of my friends but now live forty five minutes to an hour away. My friends are busy too with their lives and struggles. The bees are always working always buzzing and doing the best they can. They work towards the same goal but don’t have time to acknowledge the other as pictured in my photos.
It seems as though the last year of my life has been walking from one crisis or hiccup to the next. The end of July is the one year anniversary of Michael’s car accident. We are still a one car family. Still waiting for the insurance money to come through. Michael went through much physical therapy and is now doing quite well. Working at ups is pretty stressful and now they have changed our pension and retirement which is bringing me much closer to leaving in the next year. If I stay beyond the next few years I actually lose money for my retirement. Both Mike and I had similar health issues this past winter with Mike having to undergo surgery. My mom and stepdad were in a serious car accident a month before Mike and my wedding. I have missed much work this year more than I ever had. Thankfully my bosses worked with me on the time off. Mike and I got married in May. I had another health scare the end of May. It turned into me fighting with a nurse practitioner who in trying to cover all her bases wanted me to get what I considered an unnecessary test. She then proceeded to call me two times asking why I did not have the test done. She went as far as to try telling me I may have a form of cancer. I did get checked by my primary care doctor and my gynecologist. Both said that I am incredibly healthy for my age. A week ago I was in a hit and run accident. I was unhurt but was very frustrated that the person got away, my bosses boss thought I was trying to get an additional day off when I called out due to the accident and then it took quite a bit of explaining to 911 to explain where I was and where the accident occurred. Mike and I live on the state lines of Delaware and Maryland. This resulted in my 911 calling first going to Maryland though my accident was in Delaware then I was transferred to southern Delaware’s dispatcher before being transferred to the correct dispatcher. I was screaming at this point. I had been chasing the driver who hit me but was told to stop. It took the police three hours to respond to my accident due to two very large fires occurring not far from my accident. I ended up driving home as the accident took place only half mile from home. I should have known something was up when I told the dispatcher where my accident occurred and they said where is that.
Getting back to the bees and to finish this long rambling post. I learned an important lesson that I have struggled with and that is the need to let go… Of outcomes, of what each day will bring, and what others think say and do. Like the bees I am going out every day to do my best and now I think I need to start reaching out to friends, family and others. Perhaps that is what the accident taught me was to reach out.