Christmas & Expectations

I hope everyone has had a holiday that they hoped it would be. Michael and I spent Christmas Day at my mom’s. It was her first Christmas since my stepfather died. I was unsure what to expect as we did not celebrate Christmas with her and my stepdad last year due to his illness. We arrived at my mom’s around 1:15. We brought Meadow our dog with us. Prior to arriving at my mom’s we swung by Oakley Street in Cambridge to check our the ducks. I love seeing the variety of ducks and hearing the widgeons whistle. The ducks did not disappoint. It was quiet and no other birders where there. After a few minutes we continued our journey to my mom’s. Meadow loves to visit and was bounded into the house.

It was a relaxing day. We sat around talking and remembering. I read aloud a Christmas poem about soldiers. Michael videotaped a lot of our interactions. My sisters and brother in law called to chat with mom. One sister called before we arrived. The other sister called after we finished dinner and we all chatted with her. Finally my brother in law and his wife called and we had a pleasant conversation. It was nice to catch up with everyone. All seemed to be having a quiet Christmas. After supper we opened our gifts. Mom gave Michael and I a tiny ceramic Christmas tree that lights up. It is shown above. My sister Allison gave us the lantern that lights up. So we had a light filled Christmas. Michael and I are drawn to things that light up-Himalayan salt lamps, candles, small light displays, etc. Christmas was quiet, peaceful and happy. When talking with my mom tonight she thanked Michael and I for providing a lovely Christmas for her. It was nice to hear. I think we were all apprehensive about Christmas.

I went to Christmas Eve church services alone-which was a disaster for me. Many of my church family were not there as many do not drive at night and others were visiting with family. There were many unfamiliar faces in church. I sat alone until a family filled in the pew next to me. I tried very hard to concentrate on the readings, songs and sermon. There were many children at the service-all quiet as church mice except for one who was determined to by loud, talkative and disruptive the entire service. It was like enduring a cross country airline flight with sit kicker. Before people get their pants knotted the child did not have any behavioral issues. The child just is never told no. I suppose my disappointment at the church service started with being handed a battery powered candle for silent night. Have we really digressed that far as a society that we cannot manage to control a single flame? I was relieved when the service ended and cried most of the way home.

Today the day after Christmas I finally wrote all of our Christmas cards and mailed them. I purchased new calendars for 2020. I finally got the nerve to schedule my heart procedure for mid January. I am on schedule too for my sleep study. New Years is starting out on a health kick probably for the first time ever. Michael is committing to a healthful 2020 also. I hope to read and write more. I hope to find more joy in each day. I look forward to nature and it’s rhythms. I have been enjoying seeing Orion every night. I always miss it when spring arrives.

I wish you a happy, healthy and peaceful 2020.

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